Talk:March Hare/@comment-27950421-20170506225449/@comment-24026095-20170507000904
‘HORNY BASTARDS AND BITCHES! Are you tired of annoying Order monks losing their virginities at your orgies and not giving you enough patches of bare skin to splatter your seed on? Do you like your sex and your women/men to be so smoking hot they make the steam come out of your ears and the man/woman juices drench your briefs/panties? Are you concerned about not performing well enough for the mamono at fuckfests? Then I have the perfect product for you to increase your libido and semen count so you can drench a monster girl from head to toe with at least three large buckets' worth of hot, salty semen!!! Allow me to introduce a spectacular product called, I Can't Believe It's Not Nookie!!! The orgy-friendly alternative to everybody's favorite burning hot explosive cumshot and girlcum supplement which Order quacks sell to decrease everyone's libido and turn them into supporters of the Church!!! Using a high-tech patented process we turn renewable sexual frustration into fuel for a first date so that you produce a clean, burning hot explosion of jizz or femcum which can drench everything, even trees, across a fifty-mile radius and reaches seven hundred feet into the air if you're lying on your back, and could potentially drown you, that functions just like a real porn star's orgasm, only two and a half thousand times better! Now you can own this wonder weapon for just 700 gold per gallon of semen/girlcum you want to produce! Buy 800 gallons' worth now and get a free demonstration with our horny succubus/incubus assistant who will suck/lick and fuck anyone in the universe, and needs your sweet orgasm to survive! If you can drench her/him fully from head to toe with the amount of seed/girlcum you produce, she/he will lick it off herself/himself from head to tits/chest, ass to toes, and that sexy/muscular back and flat tum/ten-pack abs of hers/his while you watch and prepare another rocketlike orgasm for her/him! She/he has a special appendage, an amazingly long tongue with which she/he can suck her/his own toes/cock for you to watch and even perform autocunnilingus/autofellatio while we persuade you to buy our product, keeping you distracted as you're fapping away like a crazed, er, march hare! Should a single spot of this 6'3"/7'4" tall, 180 lb/225lb, 50HH-27-45/50" chest, 30" biceps busty beauty/virile stud be left unmarked with your erupting orgasm, we will refund every single shekel of your money on the spot and walk away with our metaphorical tails between our legs, leaving her/him with you wearing a soft leather collar and a switch while she/he crawls behind you on her knees and begs for a good punishment, like a caning and a painful anal raping/prostate massage with a cock-squeezing, merciless footjob courtesy of your dick/cunt and a fifty-metre dildo/strapon as you stroke her muff and thighs/just his balls with your soles and toes while refusing to grant her/him permission to orgasm, as compensation for me lying to you about our product! Who wants to go first?’ [What march hare could resist an offer to drench her man (not just his face) in her sweet nectar? Every march hare within the radius of the seller's voice will rush there to try it first. Of course, they might spill all the stuff and fight each other like werecats while guzzling it down. Then they masturbate all over the incubus. And of course, the seller would leave out the part where the succubus/incubus rapes you if the potion really works.]